Well, today no less the ride went down, REAL fast. As I have shared with some of you, Little Man our 3rd child has been a difficult child (behavior wise) since the day we brought Chunk home from the hospital. To be totally honest, I for sure thought it was just jealousy or maybe b/c he was fixing to be 2 or just him being a boy and in time all would go back to normal. Those to me now are nothing but excuses. So to cut it short (as short as possible) there is more involved it seems and I just do not know what!!
I can say we, and he have come a long way but boy, how there is room for improvement. It just seems to me we can be rolling fine with him and then one day he decides to like go crazy on us and starts to do just the opposite of what he should be doing. And this can last a day or so. Well, that's where we are once again. He does so well for a peroid of time then reverts back to the old self. I do not know how much more I can handle it. This truly wears me out. I have to say I get so tired of the constant 24/7 discipline I have let things slide and I know that is not helping the situation at all or him and is only going to make matters worse in the long run; especially when my hubby is trying to be consistant. What help then am I really being when I "ignore" it, I'm not. He also has had some trouble in Kids Corner at our church and though the teacher handles it, I get so embarrassed every time I go to get him just to hear the same thing when I ask hesitantly, "how were we today?" to which the reply is 'well, we did have to sit out for so and so." or "he tried to runaway to find his dad"
Why can he not just obey and be respectful? I know I should not do this eigther, but I tend to compare him to other little boys I see from our church and again wonder where did we go wrong? Our girls never acted like him, Chunk is better behaved than him. WHAT HAPPENED?? I just want to throw my hands up and bawl like a baby.SERIOUSLY.
A while back, we spoke with our pastor and his wife asking for guidance and one comment he mad was if he doesn't do it (obey and be respectful) at home do not expect for him to do it outside the home. This is so true and I so get that. We are doing the best we can and believe it or not we have been told by strangers while out in public how well our children behave, but at times he is a different story. It just breaks my heart and brings me to tears when I look at his younger pictures and remember how once, our Little Man who was so obedient and happy now has turned into the opposite. My heart just aches it hurts so badly. I do not know what else to do but pray and continue to be consistent in our discipline but yet I am so afraid what if he doesn't change?
I do not want him to be like some kids I know where you do not even want to be around them b/c of their behavior or attitude. Please pray for me, pray for our family. Pray for wisdom as we raise these four precious blessings for Him.
5 comments:
I have some thoughts and will share them with you at some point. I am praying for the Lord to strengthen you and my bro to handle all situations as they come the best you can. Just keep being consistent and being there for him as a mommy and a disciplinarian. I know that I am not a parent, but I have thanked my folks for doing what they did in raising me (even the hard parts) b/c I know they did it b/c of love for me. He will see that one day too... I think in a way we all do... some just choose to ignore it. I pray that the Lord will make him thankful!!! I luv ya!
I have this book...Creative Correction by Lisa Whelchel...it isn't a miracle book or anything, but it definitely gives insight and hew ways to discipline when you feel like that is all you do all day (I too have a difficult one that makes me want to cry and stay in a bubble). I'll be praying for you!
You know Jennifer, i think a lot of us can relate to a portion of this. Ryan is constant for me too. 24/7 of staying on him. he seems to have a will of iron. So, i understand your post. I also relate to looking at pics of when they were younger and remembering the innocense. Been there too. I'll pray for you when i deal with Ryan. (you'll get lots of prayer if i do that!) :) You have to be consistent even when it's super hard...for Little Man's sake too. Just hang in there. God would have not given you a difficult child if He didn't know that you and Mark could parent him well. Ryan has so many super qualities, but sometimes i'm afraid others only see the bad and as a parent, that hurts. You want others to like your kids. :) And just so you know, Christy, who usually tells me whenever other kids throw fits or disobeys :) has never told me that Little Man is bad in Children's Korner. I just hear every Sunday that she "wants to give money to Jesus like Mark Andrew does" in Sunday School. :)
hang in there mom!
Don't worry, that wonderful kid that was once there still is. You are doing good just stay positive and continue to lean on the Lord and hubby for help. Consistency is very important but don't kick yourself because you slip here and there. You have a great little guy there and his strong will, will make for a great leader as he grows and you and your husband's hard work will pay off for him. Don't give up and don't let what some people say affect you so deeply. Struggles in this life can be hard but we have an amazing help mate in the Lord to get us through things. He is the best father to go too and he has a great plan for your sons life. Find a scripture that you and your hubby can stand on and STAND. God is for you not against you.
I want to also add how much my kids love little man and how much I do too. He is a lover that's for sure! He cares for the ones he loves with all his heart and it very obvious. I honestly can't think of a time that I was with him and you and thought he was horrible and out of control. I wanted to also add that my dearest J.T. was kicked out of VBS this last summer! Though I was embarrassed beyond words to walk to the front of the sanctuary and talk to the children's minister and then walk out in front of everyone I knew that we would be okay and that there was always next year ;) We all have our moments but it's the love and faithfulness of the Lord that gets us to the finish line where God will say well done thy good and faithful servant - not thy perfect one! I will be praying for you sweets!
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